I Have Only You

Though the words you say seems so clear,
Yet I sense the true meaning is not there,
Your actions may seems obvious,
But it makes me confused as always,
You often shows dedication and devotion to me,
In contrary, your heart already belong to somebody...

Your eyes cannot hide all secrets,
As your lips betrays you everytime you speak,
Perhaps is better to saygoodbye,
Instead of facing with lies after lies,
Should we continue to move forward together?
Or turn around and move away from each other...

Constantly, you ask me how I feel about you,
And if my emotions towards you are true,
Do you really want to know?
Or would you rather me not say so,
Sweetheart, all I could say to you is that..
That...everything of you I do not have,
Except borrowed time, stolen love...that is all I have...

Once Upon A Time

You have changed drastically,
Hanging around with "strangers" exhausted me mentally,
Running away from everyone who loves you,
Willing to give up everything including me also,

I was determined not talk to you; quite hard for me,
Not until you promise you will change and be free...
Wondering if you are listening and understanding everything?
Did your addiction already fried your brain; blured your thinking?

Your promises? Listening to it over again and over again,
I was sick from it but you continued, wanted to explain,
Unfortunate my mind made up even though I love you still,
Just could not bear seeing you killing yourself with those pills...

For two days I avoided and ignored you,
The knocks, the notes from you...my God if I only knew...
Your Mom sobbing uncontrollably and told me what happen,
Why love?...Why did you ended your precious life so sudden?

One Summer Day

That Summer, you invited me to come over,
Excited and anxious to see you there,
I rushed packing my clothes and left in a hurry,
Full of anticipation I drove insanely,

My eyes was inflame; on the road heat was so intense,
But I was determine to feel your presence,
In the middle of nowhere I saw nothing,
So I drove faster, faster...until I hit something!

The loud sound...tires screeched...
A frightening sound of grinding of metals I heard,
Fragments of broken glasses; the shattered windows...
I was crushed with a solid metal with tremendous force...

Chocked with my own blood; I tried to grasp for air...
With my trembling body, I knew death was near,
If I could only hear you voice once more,
Death...I will face death with no pain anymore...

It seemed everything happened in a short moment,
Woke up recieving all kinds of treatment,
People gathered around me whom I do not recognized,
Particularly the man holding my hand and crying by my side....

The Moment

Among the crowd someone called my name,
I looked around and did not see anyone,
Then, I heard my name the second time,
Finally, I saw you the when I turned around...

For a moment I was surprised to see you,
A simple smile from you in an escape from a day so blue,
The gathering started; I was infront...you were at the back,
Strangely, I was out focus and did not know how to act...

On occasion I looked at you,
I was glad, with a smile, you were looking at me too,
Tormented of boredom the time seems eternity,
Anxious to talk to you, I sat and waited patiently...

Finally the gathering was over,
Anxiously I looked back and you no longer there...
After my work was done, I looked for you one more time...
And there were you! Finally, seconds of your time became mine..

Looking at the Mirror

As I look around,
The competetion is in the heart of everyone,
Who will win the game?
If everyone think almost the same...

Stragedy I must think one,
And forget the other one,
How will I win this game? When everyone...
Each one is a reflection of mine...

Good memory I do not have,
Who is the fastest? for sure I am always the last,
With certaintity I know, the answers I will find...
Playing and dancing before my eyes...

The class is getting smaller and smaller,
Now, I can count it with my fingers,
The fastest, smartest and the brightest ,
In one room, tying to attain the very best...

The Promise

You do not need to ask,
Everything for you; everything I have,
Tell me who you wanted me to be,
And I will be that somebody...

Kindness and tenderness I found in you,
In my heart I know, I belong to you and only you...
Your presence I cannot live without,
Honestly, you are the only one I dream about...

Forget about us being intimate,
Certainly it will never happen again,
For we almost lost each other,
and our friendship is the only thing that keeps for us together...

So, ask me anything; except for that one thing...
Yes, except for that one thing...
Remember our friendship forever remains,
If we continue to ignore our true feelings...

The Inevitable

Following the past,
Tracing each step; so fast,
Only to find out,
The sudden happiness will not last...

The obstacle along the way,
Unable to avoid in anyway
Alone once again,
Now I feeling all the pain...

Patterns in life always happens,
Not able to see where it begins,
All I know I fall once again,
Into the vicious cycle with much intense...

Hope

Brief moments will vanish before our eyes,
Please let us not end and say no goodbye,
The possibility is there for you and I,
Please come closer and hold me tight...

Time dictates our faith,
If you ask me you are worth a wait,
I will count each day; each night,
Promise, everything will be alright...

You are worried as I for you,
That our words might be untrue,
Perhaps along the way reveals love,
A love niether of us could never ever have...

Confusion and love could not longer contend,
And when that brief moments comes to end,
Just remember me waiting for you every now and then,
Wishing your heart finds mine once again...

Nothing Else Matter

Words remained unsaid,
Friendship hanging at the edge,
Leaving each other a question,
In which the answer always known...

Insensitive feelings shown,
Embracing loneliness alone,
Reassuring each others presence,
Reciting love with much intense...

Everytime a distance apart,
All falls; each pieces; each parts,
Building with definiteness,
Creating a fascade of happiness...

Vision disappearing each day,
A prensence of love someday,
Tears of joy through a window glass,
Say goodbye to each other last...

The Translation

Teach me how to cry again,
Or how to laugh which I often claim,
Teach me how to touch once again,
Or how to feel any emotions yes, including pain...

Teach me how to care for someone,
Or how to show affection; how to be kind,
Teach me how to open my heart,
And how to welcome the special one that knocks...

If I Could only return true love,
And place love... among above...
Certainly, I know what love and I had once,
But now unable to give, who ever comes, a chance...

Explain to me; tell me who I am,
Maybe...just maybe from you I will find,
The key to my heart and mind...
Why I have been so blind? Perhaps you are truely the one...

Having Breakfast With Friends

[Curiously she asked]
Do you both cook everytime?
What?...this one? you want me to try it?
Okey, I'll try...hmmm, it is sweet and has coconut on it...
What do you call this?...Shar al Banat?...taste good...

[He smiled back and said]
He cooks everything except for rice...
I am the rice king...I cook it with perfection...
You misjudge me Miss, I'm a good chef and can cook anything...
Just as I could design a magnificient flying machine in the sky...

[She and his friend laughed]
I apologized for my crazy friend Miss...oh, my girlfriend is calling...
She is on her way...what? No, she does'nt; she works at the mall,
So Miss, I am going to take a shower...
And I leave you with my dearest friend...the rice king!

[He, the rice king, looked at her then asked]
Miss...I am going to start cooking now...
Sit down, watch and have a cup of tea...I will not make it strong..
and let me boil it this time...now that we have plenty of time...
By the way...did you consider my profosal Miss?

The Echo

Look at me, I am your present,
Do not think of anything else at this moment,
Your future is so uncertain,
Why waste your time thinking of him...

What does he have that I do not have?
Love and attention I gave you enough,
Look, I can even make you laugh,
Please be with me and be my love...

Seriously, consider all the words I say,
My heart is with you and will continue to stay,
Be with me and have a fresh start,
I am sure I will win your heart,

Why can you not learn to love me?
Why are you ignoring me completely?
I Know what I did with you wrong...
But it was the only way to get your attention...

...Hunted by his voice...his words...
His presence I tried to avoid...
My world, he nearly destroyed...
Frighten by him knowing he still in my "present" world...

Here I Am

I know you exist,
But finding you is a quest,
Should I wait until you find me?
I, forever waiting for you patiently...

Or perhaps faith will bring us together,
Strongly believe I will see you in the near future,
Time and time again I have to remind myself,
That there will be "You" in my life, who I have not yet met...

Are you just a creation of my mind?
Hoping have someone to love and must find?
To have a shoulder to lean on; to cry on?
Be sheltered from the groteques world I own?

Are you waiting desperately for me as I for you?
To have forever companion and have some to love too?
Every moment all I think is you; who you are...
...it seems...it feels you are not from afar...

The Escape

As I close my eyes for a moment,
I saw those peaceful places once again,
From afar all I could see are green, white and yellow,
The rollings hills where wild flowers grow...

Warm ocean breeze touches my face once more,
It reminds me of you as I look to sandy shore,
As the magnificent sunset continue to glow,
It showers the sky with colors red,orange and yellow,

As I continue to close my eyes,
Gradually my heart starts to die,
As My thoughts, my heart anxiously takes me,
Once again to the places I long and love to see,

The beach house and the sandy, sunny, beach...
Dancing colorful wild daisies...I could see; I could reach,
Thinking of the wonderful memories, going back to the old places...
In a dream you and I...as I continue to close my eyes...

Trust

[He opened the door and smile]
Hi, your are late today. Go change in the bedroom...
We will go out and get a little something for dinner.
Do you need towel to wipe off your sweat?
Go ahead...go change and I will bring you the towel.

[She replied]
Thanks, the gym is crowded today...
I brought a clean clothes...it is in my gym bag.
I will be quick ok? Where is the room?
Oh, on the right? Thanks...

[He walk towards the bathroom door and said]
Are you hungry? What do you want for dinner?
Are you going to take a shower? I have a big towel for your hair...
I will give you two...
Here...here is the...small...and...here is...

[She was suprised and said]
OH MY GOD!...I DID NOT HEAR YOU KNOCK! I AM STILL CHANGING!
COULD YOU PLEASE GET OUT! PLEASE? DON'T GET ANY CLOSER!
IS THIS A JOKE? IF IT IS YOU'RE FRIGHTENING ME...!
PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T LOCK THE DOOR! OH, PLEASE DON'T! OH, NO!

Honesty

From you I found myself,
In your arms I feel so safe,
Your eyes full of passion,
And your love is a constant companion,

Would you come back if I turn everything back?
I will give you everything; anything you ask,
Just be with me and be my love once again,
Without you, my loneliness will never ever end,

Teardrops on my pillow everynight,
Longing for your embraces so warm; so tight,
Your soft whispers I am dying hear,
Without you, the silence...I could no longer bear,

I did not mean to hurt you...Oh my god what have I done,
I lost you completely my love...my one and only one...
Perhaps I shouldn't told you my very secret I kept for a long time,
Now, I completely lost you...you are nowhere to be found...

Conversation Piece

[He asked]
Can I touch your hand? Let me see that ring on your finger,
It looks like...silver?
Why it looks so dull...so unpolish...
Is it a promise ring?...who gave that to you?

[She replied]
Yes, the ring is a promise ring...
This was given to me a long time ago...
But it was given to me for different reason...
What? You don't believe me?...

[He responded back]
Let me take a look at it again...
Can I see it? Remove it so I can take a closer look,
Your finger is so small...
What would you say it If I tell you I will polish it for you...

[She answered him back]
What? Give that back to me...
I am not used of not wearing that ring...
You know that ring is from Ireland...
And it looks good on my siver watches. Now, give it to me...

[He replied]
Wait...listen, my friend is a jeweler...
Don't worry you will get it back...or maybe not...
If you will allow me, I will replace it with a different one,
This time a promise ring is a promise ring...from me to you...

Ignoring the Possibility

Watching him prepares dinner,
I could not help myself but to wonder,
An Engineer with brilliant mind,
A kind, thoughtful, gentle and humble man,

I love when he looks back and smile at me,
His words are direct and his emotions speaks freely,
His intentions seems so real,
Why, I have do not courage to tell him how I feel?

Why me? and why not the other?
Someone who has more for him to offer,
Why I am so doubtful I could not understand?
Why so simple things I is hard for me to comprehend?

Perhaps the possibility of he and I together frightens me,
For I believe there is no happy ending to a true life love story,
Unable to say back the words; totally I am confused and lost,
He still await the three words he love to hear from me the most...

Interesting Day

[She asked]
So, is that how you make a hot tea?...in the microwave?
What happen to boiling the water...and...is that a green tea?
I thought all tea come in a bag or package?...wait a minute...
It looks like dried weeds; Are you sure it's a tea not "something" else?
Dried weeds? and flowers?...and not a "Mari...." just checking...

[He replied]
Questions...why do you have so many questions? (he smiled...)
This tea is mixed with dried flowers so it's not too strong...
You are in a hurry to leave so I decided to use the microwave instead,
Oh, it's already done; Grab those cups...yes, right there, those two...
The tea taste better if you boil it...but we do not have time...
Let's sit on the kitchen table and enjoy our tea moment...

[She asked more question]
Okey...but should I drink it even there are "things" floating on my tea?
Why did you not use the strainer to remove the stuff after?
What? spoon it?....oh, okey...but I could not remove all of it...
Okey, okey...I am going to drink it now...it is hot though...
Excellent tea!..eventhough it has a little bitter taste to it...
And tea leaves and flowers are very chewy...what? oh, I should spit it out...

[He looked at her, smiled and said]
There's something on your lips...the weeds as you called...
Hold still...don't move, and I will remove it for you...
I love you long black hair...sit still don't move...
Why don't you stay a few more hours here? Is that too much to ask?
Wait...close your eyes don't move...wait...don't move....there...
Oh, you put too much sugar on your tea; you lips are so sweet...
...may I have another kiss?

The Truth Is

The time streach all the way to infinity,
The wait to be home come to end finally,
Anxious of seeing you again,
My heart is longing for you my beloved friend,

Everything seems the same as left,
Except you...you seems unrest,
You gave me hug to tight...
A kiss on the cheek and on the lips...to my surprised,

I caught in the moment...I do not know what to do,
Slightly, I pushed and stepped away from you,
I looked at your wedding ring...
Utterly, I felt strange; Why do you have to change everything...

You offered me so much,
Everything...everything...all the things I do not have...
But money could not replace love,
Certainly I knew from the very start that my feelings for you is not love...

I Wish You Were Mine

A burning desire I feel everytime I look at you,
Certainly, I am sure you are feeling it too,
You look away when I look at you,
Tried to ignore the hidden desires...please tell me you feel it too,

Your eyes, those gorgeous eyes...
Giving me the uncontrollable sensation deep inside,
Oh, your lips, those soft lips...
Truely, insanely I love to kiss,

Tormented day by day,
Strange feeling I could not explain
How can I suppress the feelings I feel towards you,
How can I stop thinking of you,

Love or Friendship often comes to mind,
Be my friend and forever mine,
Or should I chose love and be blind,
Then suffer the consequences time after time,

Honestly, I do not have the courage to tell you,
That my mind and heart is truely for you,
Certainly the right moment will come for me and you,
For now, all I could do is dream of you...